Ultimate shoulder rides

Oh...Its a Big Big mess..I will tell you..

No Solutions.

Its a Big Mess as in if your partner like in my case my Wife does not have interest in Shoulder Rides. etc.

And you have so much desires , than you will be left alone with your desires. There will be no one to fulfil them.

Hi Audrey.

In the initial years of my marriage, I have given her rides,,,,but actually she is not dominant in nature, and more submissive.
I told her this horse fetish of mine, and she did understood and tried to do it.

She always did it for my happiness.
But it never comes first from her side.

I don't like to do this activity with people, who are not interested in this.
Plain Vanilla carrying is up to some point, which I did with her, and it got over.

Take example of a case - If she was riding me, and I took a small break, she herself won't say to be in rider position again.
If I dont ask her to ride again, that ride finishes there only.

So, We did some rides in 1-2 years of marriage, but eventually it stopped.
And now nothing of this sort happens , nor I want to discuss with her, as I dont force things on people .

Audreyb wrote:

trigger:

I almost have to  ask  this.  Have you seriously asked  your  wife  or  discussed the subject with her?

Also,  if your wife chose to participate as  your  rider, would there  be any barriers to  her participation?

You are right Audrey in terms of my choice - That I like to carry people who are dominating and they like this activity.

I have been into many paid rides earlier (Pre Covid Times), not now but.
In Paid rides also, I like to go again to the Girls / Ladies / Mistress which somehow like this in first time, and were ready to explore it further.
I dont go again to those, who never showed me any interest in this.

You are right that Rider role is easy as to sit and enjoy, but as a carrier we enjoy when rider also enjoys the activity and take control of the horse in terms of movement and direction.

Audreyb wrote:

trigger:

So  as  I understand it, you like carrying people who like to be carried  and more or less  like to dominate ,  and your wife  simply  doesn't like to  dominate you  physically?

Since  I'm  exclusively a  rider and enjoy  being in  control , I may  not be the best person  to  consider  this problem.

However  from my point of view, I think  I would indulge a  partner who  was seriously into carrying me even if I  didn't really enjoy  the activity myself  and  I think I  could at least pretend to be enthusiastic  about  doing so.
As  a  rider,  I see my role as  a  relatively easy  one  since the carrier is obviously  the one who is under  stress  and  for the most part,  I'm just  sitting on  him.
If  I had an  attachment to the man who  wanted me  to  ride on his shoulders,  I probably would simply to keep him  from satisfying  his  fetish  with  someone else  who  might receive the  benefits that could be involved in  indulging him.

But Audrey, My Wife didn't knew that I was going to dominatrix to meet my fantasies.

Most of the men keep there secrets as always.

Though I have stopped going now.

Audreyb wrote:

trigger:

I see the  dilemma of  course  and I've tried to  imagine myself   as someone who has an  aversion  to dominating others in  general  and riding on a man's shoulders  specifically.

But I find it difficult because I  don't have very much  affection for any of the men  that have carried me  an haven't been  romantically in  love for quite some time.

But when I was  seriously involved , I would have indulged that  partner in  any  activity or  fetish he  was into   if only to prevent him  from visiting  a  dominatrix  or an other person to  fulfill his needs  or to  let that person  receive  cash  or  gifts  from  him.
Even if I hated  riding on his shoulders  or  taking control of him, I think I would climb on his shoulders  and  sit there so long  he would think I was  growing there.

Of course there are some things I wouldn't do,  but  I can't imagine myself being in love with anyone who  would want  those things.

She is Submissive and romantic in nature.

And probably I also cannot meet her full requirements, as these basic things dont come to me naturally.

I am not romantic and not dominant.

I enjoy serving women....not dominating them

Audreyb wrote:

trigger:

I assumed  that you kept your activities secret  from your  wife. A man  who  serves me manages to keep his  visits secret as well.  I honestly don't  know or  care how he does it ,  but of course no money is ever involved and I'm not a  prostitute.

My point  is  that I  would always  expect that  a man  would seek out  his  obsession with any  given  fetish  if  I didn't indulge  him  and  unless I found the activity repulsive,  I would almost certainly do whatever it was  to prevent  him  from seeking out other women  to act it out.

The truth is that there has been only one guy I was so infatuated with  that I would be concerned about  his needs in that sort of situation  and as such, I previously stated that I  may not be the best  person  to  advise  on the subject.

Dominating a man  who  wants to be dominated isn't  difficult at all  and sitting on his shoulders is not  really  difficult  even if you're not particularly comfortable sitting up there.   I'm not saying  that you should pressure your wife into doing anything  and I still believe your place is  to  serve her  needs .

I'm  just trying to  understand. To  put myself in her place for a moment and imagine why she  would risk  losing the  benefits of indulging you in something such  simple play when all  that she really has to  do is  just  sit on you  and  enjoy  the  view.

I totally agree with you Audrey.

I wish if we can also have some Carrying Clubs Like other sports, will be so helpful for people to satisfy there desires.

Audreyb wrote:

trigger:

>"I am not romantic and not dominant."<

>"I enjoy serving women....not dominating them"<

Romantic is a broad  term. I know  it's not easy  for men to understand well enough to appease a woman  who  has her own feelings   about what  is romantic.
It's much  easier to  dominate  a  man than to train him  to behave that  way.

Sadly,  many women  who don't feel  they receive enough  romance  in  their marriage  satisfy  their desires outside of  their marriage. Much as you find women  to  carry and submit to.
I wish  there was an  easy  answer to your problem.

You are right Audrey...
Earlier I used to do that - to go to paid dominatrix..
You will be surprised that some American - New York based Dominatrix have visited India for paid sessions, I have taken 2 of them, and they have been my Best Exp so far.

Though I Have stopped doing this for some time, lets see til when.

Thanks

Audreyb wrote:

trigger:

Other than paid escorts, I don't know how you could satisfy  your needs.
I know thee are BDSM clubs around that cover a number of fetishes but  you would have to search for them  and be very cautious  in the process.

I'm not on  Facebook but I understand there are a number of fetishes talked about in there   and perhaps  you could start there?

How you  keep  your activities secret  from  your wife is  something I can't advise you on.

You are right Audrey in this...

But I don't ask her to sit on me now, she will do it if I say..

But I like it when people come forward themselves to do this, not on my request every time.

Audreyb wrote:

trigger:

I'm  sure that such a session  with  a  Dominatrix from  the  U.S.  would be  rather expensive,  which of course is  why I  would  find your wife's  refusal problematic  if I were in her place.
I would suspect that you would  satisfy your  desires though such an outlet  and I  wouldn't want  anyone  getting what I would  consider to be rightfully  mine.
I can't imagine  finding  sitting on your shoulders so  distasteful  that  I would risk both  my wealth  and marriage  to  avoid it.

Yes Agreed....
You are right again.

Audreyb wrote:

trigger:

I understand  that you  really want is an enthusiastic rider.
I'm not  suggesting that your  wife  can or even  should  change what she has in  her  mind.
I'm suggesting  that  she  should at least  pretend to be  enthusiastic  and initiate  it.

In her place ,  with a husband who I  thought  even  "might" go to  a  prostitute for something  that I wouldn't do, I would  pretend  to enjoy it  or  I would  divorce him.
Obviously there are things I would find to  painful or  revolting  and I have mentioned some of them in  the past on this  forum..

I  just  don't  find sitting on  a guy's shoulders and demanding to be carried or  even  kicking him in the process to be either difficult or very objectionable.  Even if  it's not  fun for her,  she's just sitting down  and giving orders.
If a  prostitute  can fake  enthusiasm , I certainly  could.